Therapy for addiction to the phone, shopping or sex
The phone, shopping, sex, work, food. When what gives you relief for a moment ends up running your day, it makes sense to ask for help. We are a psychology center in Málaga specialized in addictions and emotional dependency, and we see you without judgment and without labels.
- Phone and social media
- Compulsive shopping
- Sex and pornography
- Work addiction
- Food and emotional hunger
The first 15-minute call to get to know each other is free and with no obligation.
Not in Málaga? We also work online → Online therapy for addictions
What is an addiction?
An addiction is a perfectly ordinary behavior (checking your phone, shopping, working, eating, watching pornography) that has stopped being a choice. It works as a form of escape: it calms you for a moment, then the guilt arrives, and that same guilt pushes you to repeat it. At our center in Málaga we support people caught in that circle.
Where is the line with an ordinary habit? More in what it is for than in how much. There are signs that come up again and again: you turn to the behavior in order not to feel something (boredom, sadness, loneliness, pressure), you give it far more time than you decide to, you hide it or play it down in front of other people, and when you try to stop, an unease appears that only goes away by going back to it.
If you recognize yourself in this, there is something we want to tell you right away: willpower is not your problem. Many of these behaviors are designed to hook you, and on top of that they serve a purpose, because they cover up real distress. That is why we do not treat it as a “vice,” but as a way of managing deep pain. That pain is what we work on in therapy.
The behaviors we support in session
Everyone arrives with a different story. These are the ones we see at our practice in Málaga.
Compulsive use of the phone and social media
It is the last thing you look at before sleeping and the first thing you touch when you wake up. You promise yourself “just five minutes” on Instagram and, when you look up, an hour has gone by. Maybe you stay up late scrolling and pay for it the next day, or you catch yourself looking at the screen while somebody is talking to you.
In session what matters to us most is what you are covering up with the device. Compulsive phone use is usually a way of not being alone with what you think or with what you feel. And no, you do not have to throw it into the sea. It is about understanding what purpose it is serving and getting back the spaces it has been taking from you: sleep, conversations, the moments with nothing in them.
Compulsive shopping
As the card goes through there is a spark of euphoria. Back home, looking at the bags or the receipt, the opposite shows up: guilt, shame, worry about money. And the promise of “never again,” which lasts until the next bad day.
When shopping turns compulsive, what you are really after is to change how you feel. Behind a closet full of clothes with the tags still on there are usually needs that are not being met, such as affection, calm or a self-esteem that has been getting damaged. In therapy we work exactly there: what takes you to the store or to the website, what you are really looking for when you go in, and how to take care of yourself in ways that do not end in regret.
Food and emotional hunger
An exhausting day, an argument, a knot in your stomach you cannot explain. Suddenly you are standing at the fridge looking for something very specific, almost always sweet or ultra-processed. You eat fast, barely tasting it, and the relief lasts a few minutes. Then, the guilt.
Emotional hunger differs from physical hunger in that it arrives all at once, asks for very specific foods and is never satisfied: however much you eat, the emptiness is still there. That is why restrictive diets do not fix it and often make it worse, because they add pressure and punishment to a cycle that already runs on guilt. The question we ask in session is a different one: what are you really hungry for? We work on binge eating and compulsive eating from that root, so that eating stops being a fight.
Sex and pornography
Of all the behaviors on this page, this is the hardest one to say out loud. Pornography use that eats up hours and leaves an emptiness behind, or sex used as an anesthetic, as a way of not feeling, creates a shame that makes many people take years to ask for help.
We want you to know two things. The first: sexual and emotional dependency is one of the processes we support, so nothing you tell us is going to shock us. The second: confidentiality is total, the same as in any therapy process, because professional confidentiality binds us and because this work does not function any other way. If you would rather take the first step in writing, the form is there for exactly that.
Work addiction
It is the only one of these behaviors that gets applauded on top of everything. You arrive first, you leave last, you answer emails over dinner and on vacation, and everybody congratulates you on your commitment. But what do you feel when you finally stop? If the answer is distress, irritation or an emptiness that pushes you to invent tasks, work is functioning as another form of escape.
Many of the people we see have merged what they are worth with what they produce: an unproductive day is lived as a personal failure. In therapy we work on separating those two things, on learning to sit with silence without escaping toward the screen, and on building a life that does not switch off when the laptop closes.
Don’t see what is happening to you here? Escape behaviors take many forms. Tell us and we will see whether we can help.
We treat the behavior and what is underneath it
At PsicoDiversa we focus on understanding what purpose the behavior serves, what void it fills, and what kinder ways you can learn to be with yourself. We work so that, by attending to the pain underneath, the behavior loses the force it had and becomes a choice again.
For that work we use contextual therapies such as ACT (acceptance and commitment), EMDR — a technique backed by scientific evidence — to process the painful experiences that are usually at the origin, and IFS to understand the parts of you that turn to the behavior. You can read more about each one in how we work.
Individual therapy is the base, and depending on the moment it can be combined with group therapy, where the group works as a mirror and as a net.
You will find us at C. Mendoza, 6, dcha, in the Carretera de Cádiz area (29002 Málaga). If your schedule is difficult or you live elsewhere, online therapy follows the same process as in person.
Who will support you
Laura Nhate Intchanhe Mendes
You will be supported by Laura Nhate, who runs the practice, in person and online. A specialist in trauma and addictions, she graduated in Psychology from the University of Málaga and specialized in Health Psychology at the International University of La Rioja. She co-founded PsicoDiversa with María Zuleica, also a psychologist.
- EMDR · IFS Training
- AO12783 Membership no.
- ES · EN Languages
How to start
-
Free call · 15 min
You tell us what is going on and we explain how we work. Ask whatever you need and decide calmly, with no obligation.
-
First sessions
You start therapy with your psychologist: you put what brings you here into words and set clear goals from the outset.
-
A process that adapts
We adjust the process to your situation and review it with you as it goes. Everyone moves at their own pace.
Shall we talk?
Book a free 15-minute introductory call. We tell you how we can help with what you are going through, and you decide, with no obligation.
You can also call us at 600 21 57 83.
Frequently asked questions
How do I know if it is an addiction or just a bad habit?
More than the time or the money you put into it, look at what it is for and what it costs. If you turn to the behavior above all when you feel bad, if you have tried to cut it down and cannot, if you hide it, or if it is affecting your sleep, your finances, your work or your relationships, it is worth talking to someone. You do not have to wait until you are at your worst: the sooner it is looked at, the easier the work is.
Does therapy mean giving up the phone (or shopping, or work) all at once?
No. With most of these behaviors it would not even make sense: you have to keep working, eating and using your phone. What we do is understand what purpose the behavior serves, attend to the distress it covers up and build other ways of regulating yourself, so that the behavior goes back to the place it belongs in. The concrete changes (boundaries, guidelines) are decided with you, at your pace.
I am ashamed to talk about this. Who is going to know what I tell you?
Nobody outside the practice. We are bound by professional confidentiality, and whatever you write in the form on this site is stored encrypted and read only by us. Shame is part of the problem we treat, especially where sex and pornography are concerned, so in session you will not find odd looks or lectures. And if talking is hard, you can start by putting it in writing.
Do you see people in person and online?
Yes. The practice is at C. Mendoza, 6, dcha, in the Carretera de Cádiz area (Málaga), and we also work online with the same process; you have the details on our online therapy page. You can combine formats if your schedule asks for it.
How long does the treatment take?
We are not going to give you a timeframe, because we would be making it up: it depends on the history behind the behavior, on the moment you arrive at and on the pace you need. What we do from the first session is agree concrete goals with you and keep reviewing them, so that you know at every point where you are and you decide how far to go.
How much does a session cost?
An individual session costs €70, whether in person or online. You will find the full price list on our services page, and asking commits you to nothing.
Book your first call — free and with no obligation.
In fifteen minutes you tell us what is going on, we explain how we work, and you decide, calmly.
You can also call us at 600 21 57 83.
Take the first step
Book a free 15-minute introductory call. We tell you how we can help with what you are going through, and you decide, with no obligation.
Write and tell us what brings you here and how you would prefer us to get in touch.
Or if you prefer, book your call on WhatsApp or by phone.